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Decoding Your Boss: My Cheat Code for Understanding What Really Matters (Even If You're Not a Mind Reader!)

You know, sometimes in the workplace, people say the funniest things. I once had an ex-colleague tell me: It's either Suzlin is really good, or she uses "pelet".

For those who don't know, "pelet" is like a magic spell. #IndoGirlsGoLoco

We had a good laugh about it, but honestly, I think it's less about magic and more about something I like to call my "motherly instinct".

As a mom of 4 active boys, you learn to pick up on little cues, right? A slight frown, a quick sigh, a sudden silence – they all tell you something. And guess what? This same skill, honed over years of chasing after my little rascals, has been a total game-changer in the corporate world! It's like having a secret "cheat code" to understand what my boss really cares about (no need to be "kaki kipas" K).

So, for all of you navigating the sometimes-tricky waters of work, I'm sharing my "cheat code" with you. You can thank me later! 😉

A box of See's Candies Peanut Brittle sitting on a laptop keyboard. The box is light brown with a white label, featuring the brand name and 'Crunchy, Nutty Goodness.' This was a thoughtful gift from my old boss.

Why Bother Understanding Your Boss's Priorities?

Think of it like this; imagine you're baking a cake, but you don't know if your customer wants chocolate or vanilla. You might end up with a delicious cake, but it's the wrong flavor. In work, understanding your boss's priorities is like knowing the "flavor" they want. It helps you make sure your efforts are always hitting the right spot, making your work more effective and your boss happier.

The "Motherly Instinct" Cheat Code: 7 Ways to Get Inside Your Boss's Head

This isn't about being nosey; it's about being smart and proactive. Here are seven simple ways you can figure out what truly matters to your manager:

1. Ask About the "Big Picture" (Direct Questions)

This is like asking your child, "What's the most important thing you need to do today?" You get a direct answer.

Question to Ask (or adapt):

"What are the top 3-5 main goals for our team this quarter (or year)?"

This is super direct and effective. It shows you're keen to help the team succeed. When they answer, don't just listen to the words. Pay attention to their tone. Are they talking about making more money, making customers super happy, making things faster, or coming up with new ideas? Their focus tells you what they value most.

This questions helped me see where my diverse responsibilities, from HR to F&B, fit into the grand scheme. It's like knowing which part of the house needs the most cleaning before guests arrive!

2. Understand Their Worries (Direct Questions)

Just like you'd ask your child, "What's bothering you today?" to help them.

Question to Ask (or adapt):

"What are the biggest challenges or worries you see our team (or company) facing right now?"

Knowing what keeps them up at night helps you spot problems before they get big. It also shows you're thinking strategically, not just about your own tasks. Their answer will tell you what problems they absolutely need to fix.

3. Know Your "Success Scorecard" (Direct Questions)

It's like asking, "How do I know I'm doing a good job with my chores?"

Question to Ask (or adapt):

"What are the most important things you look at to know if I'm doing well in my role?"

This makes expectations super clear! If they're not sure how to answer, it's actually a great chance for you both to talk about what "success" looks like for you. It's like setting up your own personal scoreboard.

As a multipurpose employee multipotentialite covering so many departments, from management to operation, this question was key. It helped me prioritize my efforts across all these different areas and ensure I was meeting my boss expectations, even with so many balls in the air.

4. Find Your Growth Path (Direct Questions)

Like asking your child, "What new things do you want to learn this year?"

Question to Ask (or adapt):

"Where do you think I can learn and grow more in my role?"

This question shows you want to get better and align with their needs. Their answer often highlights the skills or projects they really value. It's like them giving you hints for your next big adventure.

5. Master the "Update Rhythm" (Communication)

How often does your child need to check in when playing outside? Same idea here.

Question to Ask (or adapt):

"What's the best way to keep you updated on [specific project/task]?"

This shows you respect their time and how they like to get information. Their answer (e.g., quick daily chats, weekly reports, or only when there's a problem) tells you how closely they're watching certain projects. The more frequent the update, the more important it probably is to them.

6. Watch Where the Money/Time Goes (Observe, Don't Ask Directly!)

You wouldn't ask your child, "Why did you spend so much time on that video game?" But you'd notice they spent a lot of time on it.

Observe This: How does your manager use their time, money, and people for different projects?

Paying close attention to where they put their most valuable resources speaks volumes about what's important. Do they spend hours on one project? Do they give the best people to another? You can see this in meetings, emails, and who gets assigned what tasks. It's like following the money trail.

7. See How They Make Tough Calls (Observe, Don't Ask Directly!)

How does your child decide what toy to play with? Do they think hard, or just grab the first one?

Observe This: How does your manager make decisions, especially for hard problems or when things are unclear?

Do they look at a lot of facts and figures? Do they trust their gut feeling? Do they ask everyone for their opinion first? Understanding their decision-making style helps you guess how they'll react and how to best present your own ideas so they'll listen. Watch them in team meetings and when they respond to new ideas.

A Few More "Motherly Instinct" Tips:
  1. Change the Questions
    Just like you'd adjust your tone for a 7-year-old versus a 12-year-old, change these questions to fit your specific manager and your relationship with them.
  2. Listen with Your Whole Heart
    Pay super close attention to what they say, but also how they say it – their tone, what they emphasize.
  3. Actions Speak Louder Than Words
    What your manager does (where they spend their time and energy) often tells you more than what they say.
  4. Don't Overdo It
    Don't ask all these questions at once! Sprinkle them into your conversations naturally over time.
  5. Be Genuine
    Your main goal is to truly understand them so you can contribute better and shine, not to play mind games.

By using these "motherly instinct" cheat codes, you'll gain awesome insights into your manager's priorities. It helps you position yourself for success, contribute more effectively, and frankly, make your work life a lot smoother!

What other "cheat codes" or "motherly instincts" have you used to navigate your career? I'd love to hear your stories in the comments below.

P/S: And let's be real, deep down, there's a kid in all of us, even our bosses! Sometimes, understanding their 'inner child' (or maybe their 'mom or dad issues,' haha!) can be a surprising shortcut to connecting. Not manipulation, just... applied psychology! 😉

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