School Rush: Confessions of a Stressed-Out Mom (But We're All Giving It Our Best!)

All my children are now attending primary school, with Adam in Standard 5 and Iman in Standard 4 (Tahap 2). This brings an extra layer of concern as they will be in a new school this year. Naturally, like any parent, my primary focus is on my child's academic performance. I aspire for them to follow in my footsteps and enter prestigious schools like SBP; or else MRSM, or SMKA. To actively support and guide them in their studies, I invest extra attention and effort into their studies. In my simple understanding, to have A-grade students, parents must be A-grade parents (I'm trying)

Since last year, I enrolled Adam and Iman in tuition classes, while Fateh and Yusuf subscribed to online tuition and educational apps like Pandai, along with a monthly Durioo+ subscription for shared learning among them. Being a product of the 80s, I experienced the PTS and UPSR exams, and the grading system has evolved since then. The education system has changed significantly since I was in school. Exams are no longer graded A-E, but instead use a mastery level system (Tahap Penguasaan, TP) from 1 to 6. While I understand the details of each level, many parents are frustrated with the new system. They find the classroom assessment grades (Markah Tahap Pentaksiran Bilik Darjah, PBD) unreliable and unfair. Yes, I do aware this system emphasizes overall understanding, not just exam performance. But to achieve TP 6 seems challenging as students need to be active participants, even beyond the classroom.

Considering my kids' introverted nature, my concerns deepen. Adam and Iman, might struggle to meet these requirements. Not all children actively participate in school activities or competitions, and not all are chosen as school representatives. The previous school are familiar to me, frequently organized school-level competitions, incorporating participation into the grading system. However, since I'm transferring my kids to a new school in a more remote area, questions and concerns have arisen.

Overwhelmed by my situation - not in the best health, I contemplate whether I should seek a job closer to home for a better work-life balance? I must admit, for years, handling everything alone; juggling a demanding job, a long commute, and caring for my four sons as a mom is already overwhelming. Weekdays are particularly hectic as we start our day at 4.30am and only get home around 7pm. Saturdays are the only days I have them full-time. While I tend to downplay the struggles, the reality takes its toll.

But on the other hand, I love my current job, considering it my forte (even though some colleagues are challenging to deal with - no one like them anyway). I even rejected several job offers, including one overseas, which shows how much I'm committed to my current job. Regardless, no matter what the future holds, good or bad; but one thing is clear: we're all giving our best. And that's what counts. Perhaps my worries are heightened by my prolonged medical leave and upcoming treatment, but in the end, I put my trust in God's plan.