Raising Kind Kings: Talking to Your Boys About Bullying & Sexual Harassment

Look, parenting is no walk in the park no how to-guide nor SOPs. There's always something new to tackle, right? And let's face it, talking to your boys about bullying and sexual harassment can feel… awkward. But guess what? It's crucial. Like, seriously crucial.

We want to raise kind, confident boys who know how to treat others with respect and stand up for themselves (and others!). Easier said than done, I know.

So, how do we even begin this conversation?

1. Start Early & Keep it Simple

Don't wait for a crisis. Start early, even with toddlers.

• "Kindness is cool." Make it a mantra. Talk about how it feels good to be kind and how it makes others feel good too.
• "Everyone deserves to feel safe." Explain that everyone has a right to feel safe and comfortable, no matter what.
• "Use your words." Encourage them to use their words to express their feelings, whether it's anger, frustration, or even just excitement. To help, print out a 'How Are You Feeling Today?' poster to support children in recognizing their own feelings and building self-awareness. I found an example of a feelings chart on Google.

2. "What's Bullying?" - Make it Real

• Use examples: "Remember that time Timmy pushed you on the swings? That wasn't nice. That's called bullying."
• Explain different types: There's physical bullying (hitting, kicking), verbal bullying (name-calling, teasing), and social bullying (excluding, spreading rumors).
• "Upstanders vs. Bystanders": Explain that there are three types of people:
  • Bullies: The ones who do the mean things.
  • Victims: The ones who are being bullied.
  • Upstanders: The heroes! The ones who stand up for the victim and say "Hey, that's not okay!"

3. "My Body Belongs to Me"

• Teach body autonomy early on: "No one can touch your private parts unless it's for a bath or a doctor's check-up, and even then, you tell a trusted adult."

• Use simple language: Explain what "private parts" are in a way they understand.
• "Good touches vs. Bad touches": Help them understand the difference between a hug from Grandma (good touch) and someone touching them inappropriately (bad touch).

4. "Listen to Your Gut Feeling"

• "If something feels wrong, it probably is." Encourage them to trust their instincts.
• "Talk to a trusted adult." Teach them to tell you, their teacher, or another trusted adult if something feels wrong or if they see something that doesn't seem right.

5. Be a Role Model

Kids learn by watching.

• Treat everyone with respect: Show them how to treat others with kindness and empathy.
• Stand up for what's right: If you see someone being treated unfairly, speak up.

Important Note:

• Keep the conversation age-appropriate.
• Be patient and understanding.
• Make it an ongoing conversation.

Raising kind and confident boys is an ongoing journey. It takes time, effort, and a whole lot of patience. But trust me, it's worth it.

Let's raise a generation of kind, confident, and respectful young men!

I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions.

P.S. Remember to keep these conversations open and ongoing. Let your boys know they can always come to you with any questions or concerns, no matter how big or small. So, tabah jelah.

P.P.S. High-five for being an awesome parent! You got this! 😊 We got this!